thesinger
thelyrics
thechords
themelody
foryou
you're
my song.
it's been so long.
i never had a chance to play this for you.
cos everytime the music starts,
i always cannot go with the tune.
and then you went away,
now the lyrics seem to stray.
so how can i not love you?
when i live just for you.
you took away the heart in me,
that once beat in harmony.
now, i am torn apart,
feeling unemotional somehow.
sometimes, i can't help but cry.
i miss the way we used to be.
and the sad part,
the song i made,
is just a music that will fade.
but everythingmeans nothing.
Thursday, July 31, 2003
Don't know why are there so many things to say... Hmm... Well.. I forgot to tell u that I did a survey today, about Singapore.. like how do we feel about Singapore and stuff like that.. u should know! Well.. I almost had alot of negative answers and the only positive answers are thos we reflect well on me! Ha! Well.. it is juz that I don't really feel good about Singapore with all this stress and unfairness. The only thing I like about S'pore is the safe and secure country... Yep.. I always think that the government can govern Singapore well becoz our country is small! And we still have to rely on countries to have resources. Imgaine wad if no country wants to support us? Will we die? And I also think that NS is rubbish.. Face it.. Singapore can't really defend herself.. any war.. Singapore will fall.. Hmm.. alright.. that's enough! I almost finished my project today with my grp memebrs and tomorrow will do some final touch up~ Hauz.. but tomorrow meeting Ernest at 2.. but I finish class at 10.. hope Yao Cong will drag as long as possible! Hmm.. another thing to say.. I found out something very unexpected today.. really! Well.. it does brighten up my day.. Thanks! You know who u are! So sian lor juz now... is like after school today.. my friends juz left without informing or rather without waiting for me.. Maybe I am getting further apart from them? Do ya think? I don't know.. Can someone please tell me why? I juz wanna be in the same old gang.. Maybe it's becoz that I am not their project group memeber.. hMm... hope we will be alright soon.. Thanks for the happy times friends! Finally touched my guitar! Didn't do it 2 days ago coz lazy eh.. hahaha.. but anyway..luckily I still remmeebr how to play and I did not get rusty~ I postphoned my guitar lesson coz in the morning have to do project lorhz... Hai~ But school work more important right? Yeap!
if i ain't got you|10:43 PM|
ShEeSh~ Another person knows my little secret...
if i ain't got you|8:57 PM|
Good morning~ Yawn!!! Alright... I was like kinda worried yesterday.. Ernest went to JB and told me that he will be back in the afternoon, but when the clock strike twelve in the morning.. He was not back yet! He switched off his handphone and I couldn't reach him.. Thta's when my tots run wild.. Haiz.. but he did call me eventually and explained that he couldn't call me... Okie.. he is forgiven! Yesterday.. my friends and I did not attend the worshop and we all went separate ways.. I went to meet Benji.. coz I promised him that I will eat with him and I caused him to come all the way to school as I did not tell him beforehand that we are not attending the workshop anymore. We wen to PS and bought badges for our bags again... Hahaha.. After lunch and shopping.. we went to B2 and talk a great deal.. we talk all kinds of stuff and I can say that time really flies.. When we were in the train.. we were already like half dead.. and poor him.. he still have to go for badminton. When I went home.. after watching the Holland Village.. I went to take a nap.. but I am still so sleepy!!! After much tot... I think I know why I am so sleepy.. every moring.. at 6am.. my mother will somehow scream outside my door to wake my sis (my sis's room is only opposite mine).. then my sis will always like laze around in bed.. then my mother scream again at 6.20am.. sianz~ becoz if somebody juz wake me up in the middle of my sleep.. I will be so darn tired..
Oh yah.. yesterday I was talking to Saifun.. juz for ur info.. he is someone I liked very much before.. I got to know something about him.. he is going steady with last year NVSS top student...hahahha... so surprising.. My sec school friends said he finally found someone with his own kind.. coz he is famous of liking ppl who are Chinese instead of Malay! Somemore I found another trend.. he always like ppl who are in NVSS Prefectorial Board! yEap.. All elites!
Finally.. tomorrow is Friday.. which means relaxing day.. so happy~ no school.. hahahah... and next week will be Odd Week.. love odd weeks! Do u think I should get a new hp? Hmm... maybe.. but none of the phones in the market interest me now...
if i ain't got you|10:48 AM|
Wednesday, July 30, 2003
Good afternoon~ How are you feeling today? Fine? I woke up kinda early today although I have no lesson today. Coz I met my group members at 9! Sheesh~ Yap.. more or less we've finished both our proposal and power point presentation.. The big day will be on Saturday~ PRESENTATION. Yeap.. hope that we will do well..As for me.. I do not have to be present coz I will be attending a seminar, so I no need to worry so much.. But I really do hope that our group will score well.. Now I am in school's computer lab.. Shannen's group are doing their project and I am here like slacking around? Yesterday, Ernest & I discussed what are we going to do on Friday.. heheh.. planning to go Marche and maybe catching a movie.. purely DATING! Finally! Is like I am really looking forward coz I really miz those times when we are alone... Can you imgaine how long we are never alone? Hai~ of coz.. I will not forget the things I will tell him this Friday.. hope that it goes well and will not spoil our day.. Later going for a study skills workshop.. but dunnoe confirm going anot.. still have time to think.. Hahahha.. Duh.. he is now in JB.. sianz.... Oh yah.. Last night I dreamt of Benji.. hahha.. so funny..
if i ain't got you|12:48 PM|
Tuesday, July 29, 2003
DANGEROUSLY IN LOVE (Destiny's Child)
I love you... I love you, I love you
Baby I love you, you are my life
My happiest moments weren't complete if you weren't by my side
You're my relation and connection to the sun
With you next to me, there's no darkness I can't overcome
You are my raindrops, I am the seed
With you and God who's my sunlight I'm blooming, grown so beautifully
Baby I'm so proud, proud to be your girl
You make the confusion go all away from this cold and misty world
I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me
I know you love me, love me for who I am
Cause years before I became who I am, baby you were my man
I know it ain't easy, easy loving me
I appreciate the love and dedication from you to me
Later on in my destiny I see myself having your child
I see myself being your wife and I see my whole future in your eyes
In awe of my love for you, sometimes makes me wanna cry
Realize all of my blessings, I'm grateful to have you by my side
I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me
Every time I see your face, my heart smiles
Every time it feels so good, it hurts sometimes
Created in this world to love, to hold, to feel, to breathe
To live you
Dangerously in love, yeah
I am in love with you (in love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (in love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me
Dangerously (dangerously)
Dangerous, dangerously in love with you
Oh, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
I love you.. oh yes..
This song is dedicated to my love....
if i ain't got you|8:41 PM|
Seems like everyone is moving on, especially Benji and Shannen. Shannen is attached now and she is happy...good for her and heard that the guy treats her very well. =P Anyway, I think it is my turn to turn blue.. told Ernest abit of our problem and Friday will really have a good talk with him... hope that everything will be fine. I didn't practise my guitar since the day I went to Ubin.. and tomorrow my instructor is coming already! Maybe later I am going to practise a few chords.. Hmmm.. Mother is rushing me to eat dinner.. so fast.. I juz had my double McSpicy.. hai~ Oh yah.. my brother bought Sims!!! yEah~ How sweet of him right? But too bad cannot install..dunnoe why.. sHeEsh~ Anyway, he said he is gonna buy each individual version.. rather than the Deluxe Package... (6 in 1).. See.. how nice of him again~ Hahhahah... so fortunate to have him as my brother! K.. betta go and eat now and watch Holland Village.. missed a few eposides.. sianz~
if i ain't got you|6:39 PM|
Monday, July 28, 2003
Life sucks.
if i ain't got you|9:19 PM|
aRhgz.... the CMS cannot work!!! I can't do my work.. this is shit man! System cork up! Please do something!!! This shitty CMS has been a problem ever since school started.. Now have to do lotsa self directed learning somemore.. what's the use if the CMS cannot work properly? hAiz... well enough of this %*#@#%$ stuff.. I set off to Ubin on Firday and I took a boat there.. by myself! Hahaha.. never been there before.. luckily never arrive some to "wu lu" island. When I got there, the tent was already set up and ya know it was kinda big.. suppose to be a 5-6 men doom tent however there are only 4 of us.. all kinda big size ya see. Ernest, his dad and his aunt were already perspiring when I got there.. well, as you know, it was damn humid! Trees all around! By the time I reached there, it was dinner time. The first night was the best, had lotsa of stuff to eat.. I was wondering of I go there to chalet or to camp.. well, the food I got was like better than chalet! We had roast chicken, fish, pork ribs for dinner and crabs & soup for supper! wOh~ niCe eh? aUnty GlaDis is really a good cook.. whenever she is around.. there's always food! yApz.. couldn't sleep on the first night, so Ernest and I went to the nearest beach to sit down and talk..went back to camp shortly after. Woke up damn early in the next morning as we decided to move our campsite to somewhere cooler. Did get to go to the toilet and wash up, but only WASH UP.. no bathe.. hEy! I saw a wild pig running in the bushes near us! SeRious!... haiz.. then by 11, we reached to Chek Java (I dunnoe how to spell). We pitch up the tent (My First Time!) and we ate our lunch.. hahah.. then after having lunch, I went to take a nap.. it was like damn windy and the tent almost collapsed! Hahah.. when it became stable agian.. I went back to ZzZzz.. By the time I woke up.. it is like in the late afternoon and we decided to take a stroll out in the forested area.. Wanted to get some food rations along the way, but too bad we couln't find any.. We also took a walk to Ernest Dad friend's farm.. there's lotsa farm animals and most importantly.. a wild pig! yEah.. it is somehow the first time I really get a close look.. it is huge! After taking a rest.. we walked back and start to prepare dinner.. that was when I started to have severe stomache.. well wanted to skip dinner but Ernest won't allow.. so I juz eat and it was delicious~ cUrry cHicken ya know~ hahah.. how to miz that? That night after dinner.. I was like lying down in the tent and look out into the sky.. I saw many stars and this is when I started to think of Benji.. well.. stars always remind me of him coz he likes to see stars~ :) Soon after.. Ernest and I went to turn in.. He snore damn loud.. cannot tahan.. harlsy have any sleep. The next day.. woke up at 7 plus.. had instant noodles and soon after pack up and left.. I reached home at about 1 plus and took a hot bathe and long nap~ Well... shiok! Hehehe.. then now.. trying to finish my stuff and get ready to school for tomorrow.. HmMmm... I am hungry...
thoUghts: I did have fun over there, but my mind keeps wandering about.. dunnoe thinking about what. Anyway.. here I would like to thank Ernest for giving me a chance to taste the wilderness, AuNty GalsiD for cooking such delicious stuff and ErNest's dAd to keep our surroundings full of liGht! pSsT.. and also the bench you had made! Hehehe..
if i ain't got you|12:06 AM|
Thursday, July 24, 2003
I was in a daze the whole day.. I even jump at the slightest thing.. a hp ringing.. dunnoe wad's happening to me today. I went to school feeling very tired.. luckily there's only 2 hours of lesson. After school.. we gave beNji a surprise by buying a birthday cake for him... I have tried all means to be really happy and cheerful but I was juz too tired and don't feel like smiling.. I excused myself early of coz.. and I went to meet Ernest.. Kinda excited about the camp trip tomorrow, but the only thing I am afraid is that my menses will arrive or rather.. I will fall sick.. cOZ I was like so tired today and my appetite was like so small..For the whole day, I only ate one piece of birthday cake, half can of root beer and one bowl of porriage.. Surprisingly I was still like very full? I have lots of things to think about these few days.. and I think tomorrow's camp will be a very good time to give myself a break. A real break.. also, if I have a chance.. I will tell Ernest how I really feel... I have lots of things to say in this post, but I juz couldn't find out the right words to describe.. I juz hope to go back the past times... but I know.. it is kinda impossible.. Ha~ And also.. I found out that I trust ppl easily too.. this is hell an disadvantage to me.. I really hate it.. I just want to get out of whole damn thing stuff.. it is killing me... maybe some of u don't know what I am toking about.. but life really sux to the core. hAi~ juz know that I am in a real bad mood these few days... Hahaha... maybe becoz of PMS eh? Maybe now it is my turn.. everyone seems to turn like hell these few days...
aNyway.. benJi... haPpY biRthDay to yOu~ hOpe you have happI timEs aheAd!
if i ain't got you|10:46 PM|
Tuesday, July 22, 2003
yOz... back form the outing.. cOoL~ bOugHt a blousE and went to play poOl.. hahaha.. I think this time is the first time which I touch the cue very loNg.. serious! cOZ.. embarrass lehZ.. hahah.. but I think I will try and play more in future.. sO can play with my friends.. (Face it! I'm lousy at it!) hMmm.. might be going to camping this weekend.. to pulAu uBin.. hope that it is interesting~ cOz this is my first time going into the wilderness to camp! oH~ I am so tired now... sleepy.. but dun feel like sleeping so early.. sHeesh~ Luckily I have done all my work for this week.. so I can like relax abit..hehehhe. Watching Gurmit Small Talk now.. kinda interesting.. the kids so cute and innocent. Well.. tot about my childhood days.. so fun. yAzUka is still sleeping now I guess... PIG! hahahah... aiyah.. anyway.. dun want to type his nick liao.. he is none other than Ernest Chan... yeah.. Both of us had been going out for about 3+ years.. and there are both happy and bad times~ Don't want to go into detail.. hehehe... tOmorrow school starts at 8am.. arghz!
Oh Yah.. bEnji finally bought for me a tag.. hahaha.. it says "You look like shit! Is that in style now?" cOoL.. tomorrow going to put on my bag.. yEah~
Took a test:
You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.
What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
if i ain't got you|8:58 PM|
Well well, woke up so early in the moring when I have no school today? Ha~ These few days I have been sleeping early. Thanks to the club crawl man! BenjI messaged me early in the morning and ask me to go online, well, since I'm awake, why not? But he keeps getting d/c. Hmmm.. He got lots of stuff to tell me and seemed unhappy... yesterday when I talked to him, he sounded very stress and upset.. damn.. should have heard him.. sound as if the sky has fallen on him! my conclusion is.. he is kinda pessimistic about certain things.. should try and look at the brighter side. Later going to meet sHaNnEn, zHiqIanG, wEi lOng, mEliSsA & BenjI... hope that today will be fine! nO qUarrels pLs.. nO black fAces pLs! oKie... Yesterday's drving lesson was great... hell.. I never know that lessons could be so fun! Ha~ Mr Teo & I tok all kinds of nonsense and shitty stuff.. and I found out something yesterday... hAhahaha.. so surprising! I mean I was kinda surprised that he is open to me about this matter which he told me... Well.. the next lesson will be on the 5 August.. very long~ Hmmm.. I wonder what will we do today... What should I wear?
if i ain't got you|9:18 AM|
Sunday, July 20, 2003
boRinG dAy~ hMm.. I guess I should juz remain like that.. dun wanna change the letters into BIG and small.. hahaha. Today I was like stuck at home the whole day and finish up all my work. Finally I could juz take a break. I've realised that my appetite has gotten smaller and smaller each day.. I don't know why.. I am easily full. This cannot be happening because my menses are coming.. hMM.. maybe I am going to get sick.. haha.. who knows right? Benjamin had his new computer but UNFORTUNATELY... his computer got problem.. in less than 24 hours! You should have heard him.. he really sound damn depressed and sianZ... He is always stress by lotsa stuff.. He got most of his stress from parents.. Poor him. Anyway, I will be back to drving again tomorrow and I will have another long break again... Don't know if I should have more lessons or what.. cause my driving test is approaching!!! Hmmm.. I've realised one thing about myself, I don't sleep as much as before! Ha~ that's good news man.. means I will have more time to do my stuff.. I will only take naps when it is necessary... Oh~ lIndy and fRederIck patched back already. Well, I don't know when but I juz to find out accidently today. Frederick signed in MSn today and Lindy started to send e-mails as it can be detected by my MSN Messenger. I managed to tok to her thru Fred's MSN.. so.. since she is at his house.. I think they've patched up! hahahaha.. good for them! Hmmm... when I was feeling bored today, an idea came across my mind. I wanted to do something special with yAzUka this weekend but I don't know how to make it special.. keep cracking my head. Have to think where to go and what to do.. I juz do hope that we can have time alone together, at least this weekend..
if i ain't got you|10:37 PM|
Last night, I let out one small little secret, luckily it didn't affect me much, also it didn't make me think much too. However, I was glad that I've let it out. Since it a secret, I am not suppose to say right? hAhaha.. mayBe you will know.. soon.. or maybe even never. tOday I went to yazUka's house and saw a card print. He took it with a girl and his two hands were like wrapped around her waist. As his gf, oF course I was angry! He told me that he lost a bet to his collegues and his penalty was to take photo with this girl and stated that he had to be close to her, that's explains where his hands were. Of course I was jealous but that was only a samll part of it. I was angry becoZ he juz do waT his friends tell him to! Wad if one day his friends asked him to go and sleep with a girl? You get what I mean? Pride.. arghz! The photo was taken this year 17 March and I only know it until now... He did apologize in the end and I think I should not be so petty too. The most important thing is that he assured me that this will never happen again. After that in the late afternoon, I went Changi with yazUka, hIs dad and his aunt. tHe main purpose was to fish but I ended up eating steam boat there. There's wasn't any catch coZ of the tide, so I think I enjoy the "open air" steamboat rather than fishing. YazUka's aUnt prepared all the ingredients and I do have to admit that it was wonderful, however, I only ate a little coZ I don't know what happen to my appetite. After dinner, I was looking out into the sea and many things came to my mind. I've realised that after going into poly, I've changed abit. I learn how to let go. I used to spend all my time studying and never even dared to think about leisure but this time is different, I wish to fully utilize my time. I started to take up guitar lessons and juz join any activities that the school has. Club crawl is one example.. Also, I juz want to enjoy my weekends no matter how busy I am, do something that I like. I can say that my last term results.. compared to so many others.. it is juz fairly good.. but I was still able to take it and I had the "bo-chap" attitude.. coz I believe that I've tried my best. In the past.. I will juz grumble and grumble.. and try to think of hundread and one ways to improve my results or even to punish myself for not getting good results. As we all grow.. it will be different.
I was asked to go home early today and I know yaZuka wanted to continue fishing. I know very well that he was unhappy becoz he has to leave early beCoz of me. I messaged him in the car," I know I've spoilt ur day. Sorry." After reading my message, he did a very warm gesture by holding my hand, smiling.. and assured me that it was alright.. mY heart felt with warmth.. really.. I was kinda quiet for the whole day.. dunnoe why... maybe to me.. "sky really dropped down on my head"--> according to bEnJi
Oh yah... Mr Teo messaged me today. hE replied" soOo sad". Just like that. I messaged him on Friday morning that I will not be attending his lesson on Saturday and he didn't replied until 9 plus in the night juz now! weiRd eh?
if i ain't got you|12:02 AM|
Friday, July 18, 2003
fInaLLy hOme.. feeling very tireD as usUaL.. tOday's lessoNs? aRghzz.. duN toK bout it.. bOring~ aftEr schoOl.. doreEn, zhiqIang, weE lEng & I went to biShan and all of us applied for a part time job at the store besidE oRange jUlius.. forogT wads the name but it sellS iCe-creaM.. hahah.. didn't really plan to work buT I juz wrote down. I dOn't think my nexT few daYs will be a gOod oNe.. hAd a mixtuRe of feelIngs.. hAppY, sAd, aNger, tIred, sTresseD, paiN.. watever you can think of.. hai~ I dunnOe laH.. maybe iN year 2.. is like cannot relax too mucH. I think I saw my eX primary schoOl classmatE.. pRimary 1-3 onE.. I think it is her and she was with her boYfrienD.. can see that they had a tiFf... bUt wad I can say? sHe is damN skiNny~ hAiyoh.. but kinDa chIo~ nOw I really dunnOe wad to write alreadY.. maybe going to sleep~ hai~
if i ain't got you|6:51 PM|
Juz wokE up from my naP~ oR shoulD I say really tooK a naP? cOz I was disturbeD aloT of timEs.. the noiSeS outside and phOne caLL.. and guEsS wad? I haev't do my tutoriAls for tomRROw.. guEss this time I reallY suck! I don't know why.. I am feeling dowN.. maybe I am too tiREd? wE had our E-cOmMerce pRoject today.. my gRoUp matEs & I proposEd the ideA of selling oRgans~ nOt the musicaL instrument! yEp! tHose oRgans from our bOdy.. mDm tAy kInda liked our idea.. and I think it is a piece of good news for me! mEt yazUka in the evening todaY~ haD dinNer and we walked around after that.. he told me about the activities about thiS saTurdaY~ iT sounDs fuN.. but need to set off in the mornIng~ so I practically "tRy & seLL" my drivIng lessOns! wInthiN an hour, iT was successfully soLd! mEans I am oFF on the whole of satuRday! jUZ nOw when I was going hOme~ I slepT oN the bUs.. and I aLmost missed my stop! hAhaha.. luckily I woke up in a nick of timE.. if I woke up a few seconds later.. I might be going somewhere else! oH yah.. I wenT yishUn to meeT yAzUka... then my mUm said she saw us.. I doN't think so mAn! I think is someone whO kNows me and callEd to tell my mUm~ see.. how words spread! cAme back feeling very tired... then I saw bEnJi on Net.. hIs attitudE towards mE iS kInda different.. dunNoe how to explain.. but I think it is practically bAd..yaP~ maybE he is tirEd.. I dunNoe wadeveR the reasON~ bUt iT does hUrt me alittle and contribuTe to my saddness~
oH yah.. juz to ask all of you to take noTe of the piCs in the club crawl !!! I have put up a liNk.. it is at the righT hand side .. uNder the "bOred?" secTion! hAve fuN!
if i ain't got you|12:03 AM|
Wednesday, July 16, 2003
cLuB cRawL is finally over! yiPee~ sO tirinG! sHanNen, bEnjI, weI lOng and zhIqianG came over today.. ahhah.. and we did take some photos. bUt they left sooN after.. luckily there was still benJi, staying back to loOk aftEr hiS baDmiNton bOoTh. I did wenT there a few times and talk to hiM.. coz he sian and I also sianz... wELL... my club got 3Rd for the billboard competition!! yeap~ cAn say nOne of our cluB members vote for us.. and when we got 3rd.. it is considered a great achievement! Most of the club members are busy tending the booth or in the cluB rooM preparing for their performanCE~ oH yah.. did have a misfortune encounter today.. dun wanna tok about it... if you want to know.. come and ask me personally.. aT the end of the day.. actually wanted to meet benJi for dinner at 6.30pm.. buT in the end.. benjI's training ended at 7pm.. so I went home first coz I was really very tired and had work to do~ hM.. dun really feel like blogging today.. tomorrow still have a long day in school.. so gOod niGht everyone!
if i ain't got you|10:39 PM|
Tuesday, July 15, 2003
I am juZ so sHag! wELL.. I had my cluB crawl today.. reported at 10 iN the moRning.. I miSsEd all my classes today. LucKiLy I didn't miss that muCh stuff.. tHey started to puT oN make up for me and dOreeN.. and bY the timE they prepare everythiNG, iT is already 1 iN the aftErnOon! so tirinG~ have to walk the whole day! tHe star which was supposed to put over my head was heavY! hAhaha.. doreeN says it looks cute oN me.. but I have difficulty in walkIng, let aloNe turniNg my heaD! bUT of coz, I didn't put on that star the whole day.. only for the first 2 hoUrs of paradinG. wHen I came home, I was like so tired but felt only a bit better after I took a bathe~ I was like suppose to read uP somE of my stuff.. bUt yOu knOw, I am really very TIRED! I feel like sleeping now! gOsh~ this is bad.. tomorrow will be a longer daY.. I have to report at 9~ tOmorrow gO home will be worst than today I guess.. aH~ noT forgeting about my 6pm meeting tomorrow too! sIanz~ bUt today's cluB crawl was kinda fuN.. cOZ is like everyonE looK at uS.. hahaha.. especially my heAd! So BIG STAR! yEap... hai~ this week is really hell and hectic for me! I hOpe I can still copE well. BlEsS me~
if i ain't got you|8:16 PM|
Monday, July 14, 2003
tOmOrroW is the cLub cRawl!!! aH~ fInally! I changed to become a star.. something dark anD scAry to bRighT anD shiNy! yEp.. I was suppose to wear a gold evEninG gowN and a hAng a rEady-made cardboard sTar over mY head.. lOoks kiNda cute.. tOmorrow I will be missing 3 houRs of leSsons.. I hate that.. coz I will be missing those important oNes.. bIz coM-> firSt lessOn and financiAl mAnagement tutorial. I wanna attend financiaL tut! cOZ I really need to hear the tutoR to explaiN.. coZ I think I still have doubTs! I dUnNoe WhY... I juz feel so tirEd.. tomorrow mEeting doreeN for breakfast at 9.30 thEn will go anD report at 10. the whole evenT starts at 12 .. so we need 2 houRs to prepAre! I need to do this paradiNg for 3 hours on tueS and wEd! tOday's lessoN was oKie and finE. HmMm.. wad to say? I don't knOw.. I onlY knOw this week is going to bE bUsy for mE.. coz I have to catch uP lotsa things.. aCtualLy noT stress, bUt got influenced bY my friEnds! wad else! hA!
aCtually, bOth LinDy & yazUka ask me out for dinner today.. but is like I have to attend meeting! sorrY gUys! mAke up nExt time!
if i ain't got you|9:03 PM|
hMm... juz feeling so bored and yet I don't want to sleep... siAnz... tOk about my driving todaY.. When mR teo and I juz started off.. there's a traffic light in fronT.. and a lady.. with biG bOobs walked across.. nOt exactly walk.. bUt like jogging.. coz she can't find her vehicle and she is late... sO bouNcy man! hAhaha.. mR tEo's eyes were like "wOw!".. following the moTion.. hahahaha! I think she is wearing half cup bra.. that's y exposing almoSt half of her breAst.. dunnOe who she wants to attract~ aNyway.. I did aLmost perfect for my driving todaY~ and mR teO juz purposely try to piCk those little little miStakes which I coulD argUe about! wELl.. normally people can do well in the circuit.. and ouTside will not be so well.. but miNe is directly the oppOsite~ dUnNoe Y.. bUt it is dangerous cOZ I might immediately strike the kurb in the circuit which is an immediate failure! mR tEo told me that he had a fixEd traineE, had a pRac tEst yesterdaY.. an auNtie.. hE alSo said her driving skills more "teroK" than miNe but still pass with only 8 demErit pOints! gOsh.. so he says that I have no reasoN to faiL.. weLL.. I think it aLL depends on ur lUck~ I am only afraid that I am nervous and panicky at the same timE~ tHen sure dIe!
tOmorrow onlY have 2 hoUrs of lessoN.. hAi~ iS like seems so "seng lang" but got lotsa work coming up.. stress! tOmorrow have to stay in schoOl until quite latE.. coZ have cCa.. starts at 6.. and is like I ends school at 3? sO aftEr that.. maybe go to liBrary and do some work lorhz~ tOmorrow really have to pay attention in clAss already! haha~
if i ain't got you|12:08 AM|
Sunday, July 13, 2003
I tHinK it is timE to settlE down for reAl buSiness.. STUDY! bUt I think I will only start at 4 plUS, which is after my drIvIng lESSon. I was talking to zHiqIang a while ago and he said that he is very stress. Well, I gueSs everyonE is facing the same problEm and it only depends how each individual sees it. sOme might think is nothing.. some mighT think otherwise.. I think I am the otherwiSE~ I have not done any owrk since scHooL starts and I think I should worry... buT I am jUZ to lazY.. sheesh! I am blogging noW coz I think I will not really have time to blog todaY as I will be rushing for my assignments and stuff.. I can imagine how busy I will be later.. nOw.. I do really hope that I can pasS my dRivIng test at one-go.. so that I will have more time for my sTudies. I didn't know year 2 is gonna be tough.. like have to start working hard froM weeK onE? I have downloaded kAzAA-lIte and starting to download sonGs.. nOw I have a cD-writer.. so I could juz burn my sonGS.. I think I am going to borrow diScman from yaZuka.. instead of buyIng onE~ yEpzz.. but muz wait till I got time!
I will be having clUb crawl next tueSday and wEdnesday.. but I think I only need to be present on wedNesday.. hope so.. cOZ in this way I will not miSS any lessOns.. hMm.. I think I am going to stop writing noW.. alright! take care buddiEs! gEt ready for the nEw terM!
if i ain't got you|1:02 PM|
Saturday, July 12, 2003
jUZ camE bacK from a bBq~ iT was in yisHun. I came back earlier cOZ yazuka, hiS dad and hiS auNt plAnninG to stay on until 12 pLus in the morning? yEap.. can't expect me to stay right? wELL... tHis afternoOn I went to schOOl for mY ccA.. they dreW my facE again.. this time I think it looks nicEr.. YEAh~ I lOoK.. uRm... sCary and bitcHy! hahahaha yEap.. goThic wad... suppose to bE scary! I wanted to waSh my eye liNear with soap but the soap accidently went into my eyEs.. iT hurts of coZ! mY whole right eye wAs rEd~ tHen I wenT to meeT yazUka and hiS daD came to fetch uS to the yIshUn fiSh pOnd. oF coZ I didn't fish.. I only eat! hahah.. niCe.. ate until very fUll. WHen niGht falls, Yazuka went to a corner to fish and becoz it is so dark.. he couldn't really see the planks and goes without saying.. he dropped into the water.. luCkily only part of the leg. hE comMented that he almost lost his "baLLS".. hahahaha!
tOmOrrow I have another driving lessOn.. heheh.. and I guess I am going to stay at home the whole day! hAve to do some work! moNday.. the new batch of students are coming in.. hope that there are some cutE hUnks! oH yah.. benjI wenT to plAzA siNgapUra today.. wanted him to help me buy something.. buT the shop was closEd.. damnEd! oKie.. I am gonna to stop blbbling! niGht!
if i ain't got you|9:14 PM|
Friday, July 11, 2003
dRiVinG lEssOn was fUn today! I waS so tIred before I go bUt when it waS finished.. I becamE a happier pErsoN~ dUnNoe whY. I kept bullying mR tEo todAy.. hAhah.. blaming him this and that. I think it is becoZ I am not so selF conscious of my drivIng.. that's y I did pretty well today. mR tEo was kinDA shocked too! yEp.. wanna tell you about my groupinGs todaY. iNitiaLLy, I grouped with sHanNen, zhIqianG, wEe lEng & dOreEn. buT then.. mDm tAy said.. there are 4 morE pPl left out so have to regrouped again. tHe group leadeRs have to like opt someone out in the group and choose one of the left 4s. bUt We think it is kinda cruel.. so yao cOng suggested that aLL the group leaders will team up and eacH groUp wiLL adD another one of the 4 memberS. mDm tAy didn't want that 4 to group together coZ don't want them to sinK... so this is the only way.. that's Y I am a team with yAocOng, sIm lIm and yI luAn. lUcky for me that everyone so cooperative so I have nothing to worry..
bEnjAmIn mentioned something about yazUka today... He read my bLog and he asked me about it.. acTually I got over it liao... bUt HE MENTIONED IT! argHZ.. onCe again.. me mooD was not that gooD, bUT I was fIne sooN! I hOpe that I will have a nicE weekenD! bUT I will be packed with school work!
if i ain't got you|11:10 PM|
oNcE agAiN.. I am bLogGing the the moRniNG? dUno WhY.. mAyBe I am juz too freE? hMmmm... I will only be having two hour of lesSoN todaY~ luCkIly no Need to dO anything muCh.. juZ form the groupinGs. I told sHanNen laST niGht that aLL five of uS (wEi lOng, zHiqiaNg, shanNen, bEn & Me) sHoulD splIt uP and joiN in other groupS. cOZ I think wE are too dependent on each other and woRk is hard to be donE. iF we are with someOne we are not so close wiTh, aT least we will bE forced to dO somEthIng, iF noT oTher partiEs will bLAme us.. I think doIng iN differenT grouPs aLso can maintain our frIendshiP with each other. tHere are somE cases out tHere, lIke before doing the projEct, they are very good frienDS and after doing it, they are liKe enemies cOZ aLL of them think differently. lAst yEar, mY group did have sOme tensIon anD disappOinTmenT, buT Lucky enough, iT didn't really change muCh oF ouR friEndshIP. BUT, I think there bound to be someone stilll with a same group membEr.. dUnNoe lahZ.. but if reallY cannot, nO choIce, sTill can grouP together, buT I don't miNd! :) jUz hOpe everytHing goEs finE!
I will be havinG luNch witH shanNen laTer.. I dO hope that she will take care of herself. tHings really aren't going weLL for her. tAke cAre! The pasT is the pasT, jUZ forget it. SMILE!
if i ain't got you|11:23 AM|
Thursday, July 10, 2003
hEY! lIfe sUx indeed! wE have to dO mucH oF indEpendent learNing! wE are leFt to dIe~ dIe~ dIe! aRgHZ.. I gUess my resuLts are going down the drAiN. wIsh me lUck! hEy, bTw I got a cordLesS kEybOard & mOuse.. bUt I juz misS the feel of mY keyboArd. dOn't hAve the sound of typIng.. shEesH~ dUn feeL likE doing anythinG, tireD!
if i ain't got you|9:15 PM|
I dOn't kNow whY.. iT is juZ so upSetIng.. lIfe iN sChOoL is reaLLy nO gooD.. mAnY restrictioNS and when I look at the modules I am takinG tHis semeSter.. I really don't know how to survive~ iS lIke they are so drY and bOrinG. noT iNterestIng at aLL! yEstErday, I waS really tirEd.. I mean REALLY tIred... buT I juz don't want to sleep.. I juZ feel saD.. dUnNoe Y.. U knOw thaT kiNda feeling? yOu juZ feel sad but you don't know whY.. I know my adviCe said I have to be happy.. yEs.. I still smiLe.. but iN my heart, it is cryIng... I don't know how can I always do it these fEw years... sMiLe although I am sad? hAhahaha.. yAzuKA is going to CMPB todaY.. I guess this is it.. he is really going to armY. wAnted me to accomPAny him todaY, bUT latEr he said better noT, cOZ I have to wait for verY lOng..especially the "check up" part. I wiLl be returning to my driving leSson tomorrow.. hope I can stiLL remember and maybe by then my moOd wiLL be better. Later mEetinG shanNen to report the loSt of her Ez-Link carD, anD maybE I will make a trip to popUlAr and buY somE hiGhlIgHters..
aLthoUgh I onlY have one lesson todaY, buT then the daY seems so lOng.. is lIke this is somehow the first timE I am really dread of going to schOol.. I really don' kNow whY. nOt that I've loSt Interest iN studying, bUt maybe becOZ of the environmenT there... U kNow the peopLe, tEachers, etC.. anYthing! I think getting a coMputer for my sistEr is not really a bad thing.. I can plaY mSn games with heR altHough we are only nexT doOr.. hAHAHA..
pLayed onlIne mOnOpOly yEsterday.. twiCe.. One with stranGers and another with derRick.. derRick is gooD.. he managed to stay in the game very lOng.. but nevertheless, I still pRefer to play board gamEs.. nOT iN the comPuter.. tHos who study IT will knoW.. tHere's alWays a sequence when the dIce is thrown... tHen I happen to tell a guY that I am playing monopOly.. and he asked me "wAds thaT?" tHis time I really faint! whO duNnoe what monoPoly is???!!! sOmemoRe he is a uNivErsity studEnt? dOn't tell me he has nO chIldhOod timES? I dunNoe why lAhz.. But I juz feel fuNny..
tOday I miGht juZ stay in schOOl quite late.. juz want to tire myself and dO aLL mY unFinished stuff... cHAo!
if i ain't got you|11:10 AM|
Wednesday, July 09, 2003
fInaLLy hOme! fIrSt dAy oF schoOl? bOrinG.... dUnNoe wad to say.. aLmoSt slEpt in lectuRe and didn't really concentrate in cLass.. noT uSed to it eH.. hai~ sOme pEoPle changed their stylE.. bUt of cOZ I am still the same! hehehehe.. aT lEasT, at the end of the daY.. bEnjI and shAnNen are at tokIng termS. I fInalLy ate mCsPiCy dOuble buRger today! hehehe.. wanted to try it for a very long time, but always forgot! iT is deliciouS I shouLd say, buT I would prefer to eat the chicken aLoNe~ wItHour the bRead, veGGie & mayO sAuce. tOday had alot of hard time buying the noTes.. damN siAnz lOrhz.. hAve to collect monEy here and thEre. tOmorrow I onlY have an hour lessoN.. yIpee~ and luckily it starts late too.. hMmm...
if i ain't got you|6:35 PM|
gOoD moRnIng~ yAwn!!! wELL.. shouldn't wake up so earlY todAy, bUT I have to pAck my bAg and stuFF & I've realiseD that iT oNly take me for bouT 1 mInuTe? sHeEsh... nOw there are no problems accessing the pagE nOw.. I thinK iT is bEcoz of the "sHouT oUt".. hAhaha... AnywaY, I've receiveD a call froM the buSinEsS BloCk iN nYP and tHis tZUtoR calLed mR.Ho askEd me go and see hIm.. I was like thinking aloUd "hUh!? wAd diD I do?" hE seemed tO kNow wad I was thInking then he saiD, "dUn wOrRy, noThinG sErioUs.. I nominateD you to go for a seminar." pHew! I tot waD.. bUt he distuRbed mY slEeP!!! aRghZ...
I caLLed yAzUka latE lAsT nIte... he tolD me how he felT.. he saiD I "stick" to him too much which is not a gooD thinG. eVen hiS parenTS thinK so.. wAd dO yA thinK? bUt I juz want to spend more time with him together! iT is noT lIke iF he is not in Singapore, I cannot eat or sleep right? lIfe stiLL goEs ON~ Also.. I dOn't think I really stick him that muCh.. considering that I only see him average about 1.5 times a week? eVen somEtImes when we meet up... we only spend a few houRs.. like 3? aNd aboUT 70-80% of the timE I am wiTh hiM.. I cannoT be aLone with hiM cOz there's sOmeonE there? sO do I have any chance to stick with him tHen? eVen I did.. I think I have the reason to do so... aLso.. I didn't really tok to him on the phone as much as before.. even there is.. aVerage about 15-30 minutes.. someTimes not even 5 minUtes. hAi~ I dUnNoe ah...bUT I did explaIn to yAzUka how I feel.. hMm.. I will still be as normal I guess! (yAzUka is going to sigN-oN for 6 yEars!) cOncLusioN is maybe hiS parents should know the amoUnt of timE we CAN spent togEther ALONE.. wHo don't want to spend with his/her lovE alOne? aRghz...
mAtters between shAnneN & bEnJi got worst.. HAi~ I don't know wad to comment.. mAybe both of them are at fault.. maybe onE day they should I sit down and settle things once and for aLL? tHen they can be at least frienDS? I don't know...
--- I cried in my sleep last night ---
if i ain't got you|9:42 AM|
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
hAi~ lIfe suX bIg timE! I was actually very happy today coz I wenT ouT with my pOly fRiends.. to kTv.. we had such an enjoyable time except for bEnjI, cOZ he had an upset stomach.. sIan.. theN he looked like zOmbie the whole dAy! wEll.. he did sing for some time.. buT he sounded dAmN soFt~ nevErmInd! dUn tok about him anymore.. tok about moI! yAzUka is qUitTing schOol and means he is going to NS.. dAmn sAd man! I was moody for the rest of the dAy~ dUh! I doN't know why.. thiS timE he had hiS moTher and fAther's consent.. sO I think more or leSs confIrm alrEady.. argHZ! oNe gooD tHiNg abouT today is that mY cOmpUter is aLive again! yEah! and mY monItor is a fLat scrEen oNe! woH~ Hmm... sO sIck.. cOZ whenever I read ppl'S b|oGs~ always got this pop-ups.. askinG me if I want to debuG.. hAi~ cOZ my internet versiOn is not compatible.. cOZ miNe is the hiGHer verison.. yEap! nevErmiNd~
I am toking to bEnJi nOw.. poor bEnjI is listening to my lamentations! hOhohO~ serveS hIm riGht! dUh! sChoOl starting tomorrow... starts at 1 pM.. duNnoe should feel happy or noT.. sIanz.. after hearing yAzuka's news.. I duN think I will feel good tomorrow.. siCK!
if i ain't got you|10:39 PM|
Monday, July 07, 2003
Damn.. have to do this blog fast.. coZ my sIS wants to use the computer and I have to calL somEone~ wEll.. due to some reasonS, yan rOng and liNdy didn't come to my house yesterday.. insTead I meT theM todaY.. I bought another skiRt & a ladYfInger.. miNd you! noT the veggie.. something to hold up ur hair! aNyway.. hai~ no moneY liaO.. hahaha... then we went around to see see and look look.. lastLy.. we went to a jApanese restauranT and have ur dinNer.. yA knOw.. yan rOng ordered a dish that called "NABEyuki" oR somethIng liKe thaT... hahaha... lIke a bad hokkien word.. then the servicE crew was like saying "NABE" noodles.. yA knOw wad I am thinKing rite? theN later.. we went to starbuCks and buY cOcoa.. yEAp.. oH yah.. I saW simLim, yao cOng, dErRick & seaN todaE.. hahaha.. tHankS to siM lIm sHinY haiR..hehehe.. theY muZ be wonDeriNg whY I walk deRrIck to the traffic liGhts.. coZ mY friends were walking there and they suddenly said they walked in the wrong directioN.. hOpe they are not misTAken!
yEsterday.. iN orchard alSo.. I saW a chiNese maN like fighting a toUrist... gOSh.. hAte that.. diSgrace our couNtry oNly.. I onLy saw that chInese man shouting like mad and pushing the "ang mO". yAzuKA came back last nIte! yEAp.. and I gave him a keY chain todaY.. "THE HAPPY FISHMAN" hahah.. and ya know whY? coZ there's a fish somehow sucking or biting the fishermAn's "bRother".. hohoho!! okIe gtg noW.. bLess aLL~
if i ain't got you|9:43 PM|
Saturday, July 05, 2003
dUnNoe waD hapPen to mE.. iS LiKe I have been strikinG the kUrbs toDAy.. aRgHz... MAybe I was jUZ too tiRed.. tRied to access to cItIbanK webBie tOdae.. helpEd my muM to uPdate the addRess.. bUt seems that I couldn't fIne the lInk for that.. hAi~ nVm.. AnD now.. mY brOther's iCq duN seem to be workinG.. cOZ I have to coNtact onE of hiS friEnd and messageD hIm hIS pHone nUmber.. siAnz.. oH yah.. MY brotHer wenT to mAlaysiA.. that's why I can usE hiS comPuter day and niGht these few dayS.. hehehe.. oH gReat.. hiS iCq iS workiNG now!! hAi~ I really look forward tomoRrOw.. cOZ first and foremosT.. yAzuKA is cOmIng back froM malAysia!! anD anoTher thinG is that LinDy and yAN rOng comIng to mOi hOuse! yEAh! hMmM.. yan rOng and I pRomIsed each other that we will sEe mOre of eacH othEr oFten.. eveN whEn schOoL starTS.. bUt I am aLways the onE nOT freE.. ya sEE.. so Sorry! yEPZ.. cAt's fiNally wrote an eNtry iN hEr bLoG.. iT was awesoMe! hAHaha.. I think she is starting to learn mY cRApPy stYle.. hehehehe... And sHe saiD.. catS and pUssies LoVe to cRAp! sHeesH.. I am named as a pussy.. miNd you.. hahahahahahaha...
if i ain't got you|3:43 PM|
Friday, July 04, 2003
bOOked mY test Date tODae~ tHen I tolD somE of moI fRiends.. then my muM toLd me not to tell anyonE! hMm.. that's Y I won't reveal anything in here~ wELL tHose who kNows.. dun TeLL anYone K? aNywaY, I wenT for a stAgearTs mEetinG todaY.. I waS supPose to bE a moDEL for them and I was suppose to bE lIke a goThic?! yEp.. fOr doreEn.. an anGel.. lUckY her.. at least her eyeshadows are not black! tHen the meetinG ended later than I expecteD.. aftEr thaT I wenT to mEet jOvin.. she planning to buY an electRonIc guItar.. hopE shE can fInd oNe she likes! tHen I wenT to mEet LinDY and yAn rOng.. yAn ronG toLd me that lIndy was "da shanG" bY 2 gUYs! iN oNe daY~ sOmemOre in The samE pLAce- bUgiS~ I can say that she is chIo! hAhaha.. onE guY frOm ngEe anN pOly and another gUy froM nAnyanG pOly! caLL "xiAo bAI" or something.. hahahha! wE atE genKi suShi and spent about 8-10 buCks or sO~ qUite cheap..
hEy.. anoTher tiP from mY moTher... before you go for driVing tesT... muZ weaR everythiNG bLack.. even your undergarments! sO.. pLAy safE ah.. bEtTer pasS for the firsT timE.. dUn wastE anymorE $$$. aNothEr terriblE thinG had happeN.. lIndy broke off with her bF (FrederiCk).. oF coz she is sad.. wEll.. jUZ want to tell her that life still has to go oN.. dUn be so depressed K?
if i ain't got you|10:44 PM|
LUckIly... mY bRother's coMPuter iS Alright nOW... hMm.. aCtuaLLy, I was suppose to booK a pRActiCAl TEst dAte yeSterdAY (dRivIng), buT the system waS doWn.. sO todAy gonnA mEet mR tEo earlieR to gO and bOok togEther.. I gUess I reallY have to miSs lessoNS bEcoz of thiS tesT.. hOpe I can juZ pass it at one gO. lAst niTe I couLdn't sLeep.. bEcoz I was thInking abouT mY dRiVing! I am very aNxious~ wISh mE lUcK aLrighT? yEsterdaY, yAzuKA had already left for mALaysIA.. I tried manY wayS to occupy mY miNd, so that I will not start thinking about him so muCh.. bUT ya kNOw.. how is it possible for me to occupy my mind for 24 houRS? wIthouT thinkIng about hIM?! tHAt's iMpossiBle.. I didn't expect that he will cAll.. coZ he didn't bring hiS handpHone aLong. bUT hE surpRised me in the niTe~ hE caLled! yEAh~ hE toLd me that he useD his aUnt's hP.. hehhehe... gLAd to hear hiS voiCe.. if not I will not knoW hOW muCh I miSs hiM.. tOday haD a wholE lIne of activities waitIng for mE.. lAter going for drivIng.. theN gO to schOol.. theN mEeT joVin.. theN meeT yAnrong and liNdy~ yEP! feLt niCe to see them again.. hAte it wheN schOol starTs.. coZ can'T really have so much time to seE theM.. mAybe I should chooSE SP (sIngApoRe poLy) iN the fiRst PlacE? I don"t kNOW.. bUt nYP is jUZ as gReat~
if i ain't got you|11:25 AM|
Thursday, July 03, 2003
hEya~ mY comPuter hAs brokeN dowN and will only be fixed bY nexT weeK.. sO won'T be bloGging these few dAys. mAybe I will jUZ blOg in school when sChoOl teRm starts (9th). I've checked my time table.. well, I think it is okiE. bUt Remember I've tolD ya the oDD-eVen weeK system.. weLL.. abit complicated~ hA! Alright..gtg now! cYA~
if i ain't got you|3:34 PM|
Tuesday, July 01, 2003
wOke uP dArn EArLy toDAy~ AnD nOW I aM feeling very sleepy.. wAitiNg fOr yAzukA to wake uP... dIdn't gO oUt toDAy and there are a number of reasoNS. fIrSt.. no mOre moNey and nEXt.. vERy Tired~ I wenT to eaT seouL gARden yEsteRday (wIF yAzukA) anD bOth oF uS waiTed loNG for the food to be cooked~ cOZ theY useD cHArcoaL.. wE were very huNgry then! tHey hAve moRe varietIes of iCe-creAm there! anD yazukA trieD evey oNe of theM~ tO me.. the manGo iCe-cReam waS niCe~ tHe prawnS are not so good.. had a smell and vEry salTy~ yUcks! aFter walkIng awhile~ wE wenT to dRinK coFfee. I ordered a wArm miLk and a chocolatE cakE. yAzukA aLwayS make a poInt that I cannot go hungry and he is always feeding me.. tHAt's explain my sizE now~ hAHaha!!! wAd I lOVe moST is to eaT wiTh hiM~ I alWAys have a great appetitE and mY foOd seems to taste niceR.. dUnNoe whY!!! hAHAHA~ oH yah.. tokgin about food.. I have to comment about hiS mUm's cOokinG skIlls~ dEliCiouS! yEp! espEciallY her sambal pRawns and her home mAde "balachan"! yUm~ I didn't eat my breakfasT~ nO wonder I am starved! aLrighT! gTG~
if i ain't got you|11:42 AM|
